Case facts:

• Ed was 61 when he died, Katherine is 59
• Her 2 grown children- a son and daughter- both live out-of-state
• Ed primarily managed their finances, though Katherine was involved
• Ed had planned to work 3 more years to bulk up his retirement accounts
• Ed had life insurance- both from work and private- totaling $650,000.
• Katherine works part-time as office assistant in a medical practice

Katherine was referred to me by a friend of hers.  When she first called she was quite sad and stressed.  Her husband Ed had unexpectedly passed away a month earlier.  After planning his funeral and receiving the outpouring of help and concern from her friends and family at that time, she now found herself deluged with bills from his medical care, letters from the health insurance company, and decisions to make regarding his retirement accounts and  life insurance policies.  On top of that, she was receiving calls and letters from all sorts of people looking to help her.  She was overwhelmed.

We met the next day. Over the course of a couple of hours we talked about what she was experiencing, what concerned her most right now and going forward, and what decisions she was being asked to make now.  Her answers weren’t necessarily surprising, but they helped me understand her current situation.  She said:

• She was tired, scared, overwhelmed, frustrated and confused
• She was worried now about:
  • How she would pay all these bills coming in
  • How she would pay her mortgage and her other “normal” bills
  • Making a mistake that would cost her a lot of money
  • Who she could trust and not being taken advantage of
  • Not worrying her children that she couldn’t care for herself

• Her longer-term concerns were:
  • Can she afford to stay in her house
  • Does she need to find a full-time job
  • Is there enough money to live on for the rest of her life, and if not, what to do
  • Should she move to her daughter’s town as is being suggested
  • Should she leave the insurance money in the bank, or invest it- and how

• Some of the other things we learned were:
  • She enjoys where she lives- the neighborhood and the town.
  • She has a good network of close friends who she believes will remain close for companionship and help
  • She feels she could handle more of her finances if she just knew how
  • She likes her job, doesn’t want to leave it, and there might be some opportunity to work a little more if she wanted to.

We ended our meeting by outlining for her the process I would help her with over the course of the next year or so.  I emphasized that initially our focus would be only on those things which had to be handled now, such as the medical bills, applying for and receiving the insurance money, and settling Ed’s affairs at work (his final paycheck, applying for any additional benefits, etc.).  Other decisions like how to invest her money or whether to move or not were better handled at a later date, when she had had a chance to grieve, to adjust some to life without Ed, and to get comfortable with her new situation.  I understood her concern about who to trust, and encouraged her to talk with her children and close trusted friends about what we were proposing to do.  suggesting,   I encouraged the children to call me if they had concerns.  I wasn't there to sell a product, but to offer a service to their mother.

Katherine decided to work with me, and we took our initial plan, filled in the details, and set to work.  There were some rough times for her when life and her responsibilities seemed too much, but I educated her about her choices, ran interference for her when necessary, and removed as much of the burden of getting herself financially settled as I could.  In the end, she decided not to move since she likes her life here, she’s working a little more but understands what she can afford now and in retirement, and she’s starting to build a new life without Ed.  It took time, but she’s moving forward personally and financially.